It is so very confusing trying to figure out the subtle difference between the mind and the heart. The mind is so very egoistic, morphed by facades, has burnt beleives unlike the heart which knows not of any such morosities and is pure in its intentions to the depth. It is like a bottomless abyss, a never ending container that expands itself according to its content. Anything pure from the heart is boundless, expecting nothing in return which is quite opposite to the ways of the mind.

Sometime back, i ended up in a discussion with a friend on ‘liking’ and ‘obsession’. Like a repeated folklore story, my mental model didn’t seem to fit theirs and theirs to mine as before. It was like a puzzle but of course such intricacies of the heart are moulded by the personality and so i consoled myself that there is nothing here to ponder. The thought hidden, has been eating away my patience silently, for quite some time until the ever dissipating ‘anger’ showed up from nowhere to inform me that the thought was matured. I started pondering on it again and it was just a flash, an image pretty descriptive and yet cryptic as ever, showed up before my inner eye to explain such a makeup of the mind.

The image was about a heart shaped entity dissected in the middle and with different layers of stuffs covering over it. It seemed very much like layers of metals covering or rather protecting something delicate which can easily be affected. It was precisely like layers of iron covering the core made up of cotton. So the desire, the emotion, the feelings, the longings which are all basically different forms of heat, have to penetrate the outer strong layer to touch the deeper one. And once it finds its way, or in other words when the emotion becomes so intense that it can touch the cotton, then cotton will go on a fire, on a rage in effect of the emotion. The longing of the mind will join hands with the burning heat provided by the heart, amplifying the result such that desperation creeps in.

I have come to realise that i see no difference between ‘liking’ and ‘obsession’. It may mean that i am weak and the single layer of iron will fall for every emotion, giving way to burn the cotton for every silly desire, amplifying it as obsession unlike others for whom the gradient of protection prevents such a thing and hence the variation in liking is evident. It also seemed to answer why i have boundless energy inspite of my paltry food supplies, less water, but spend lots of my heat in doing things that i am obsessed with. The cotton keeps burning, not leaving the mind at rest, the underlying flame keeps the body moving, pushing it farther and farther, not realising that the bag shall tear beyong a certain threshold, not withstanding the heat it has to handle.

Oh thee dark one, Oh lord of ashes, Ye who haunts my dreams,
Take my heat, supply me with pure aspiration,
Burn my desire once and for all
Bless me with peace and calm this swelling heart.

Fear is the greatest enemy of the aspiring soul, the power which will obstruct the purification of the self from comprehending the ultimate truth.

Shun thy fear and rise up from the abyss,
Fear not anyone or anything but realise,
The ultimate truth that we bear the same identity is concealed,
Aspire to see it and it shall reveal itself.

The fear of entities in specific is baseless which can be easily overcome. This is the result of the mind not exposed to the entity and the formation of the mental barrier from seeing the identical self, the reflection. This is one of the types of fear.

The other fear is the fear of abstract things or the fear of the unknown. Thee who fears not anything shall have fear about the unknown, the abstract, the imperceptible, the incomprehensible, something which does not seem to have an answer. Overcoming this fear needs the self to push itself and make the mind understand that everything is an impersonation of the divine and that all living or dead, with form or without, bears his mark. The mental gnosis is not enough but the realisation needs to happen.

Fear of thyself is the worst among all of the fears. It is the fear of unpredictability of the self, since the mind and the heart are not in sync, the mind is eaten away by distorted thoughts, every action is not planned before, no intuition, no string of thoughts leading to calmness.

Burn thy fear, heal thyself with the help of Agni, the purifier, preserve thy heat and melt, solidify thy core. In it thee shall find the identity and until then fear shall keep haunting, the distorter. Abstain from the dissipation of the tapas aggregated over time and use it to bring out the fearless true instrument in you.

Lately, i have been reading one of the books by SatPrem titled ‘On the way to Supermanhood’ and i have kind of got obsessed with it. The idea that he proposes are too obvious yet far beyond the reach at the same time, giving all kinds of illusions to this wavering, focusless mind. The one idea that has been constantly feeding on me like a virus, is that the thought about all the vedic Yogi’s and Rsis being able to achieve what they were able to perceive in those primitive times while right now, every entity illusioned by thinking that the power of the mind can be fully exploited and that it is just near the grasp as being purely absurd.

Thinking about it, it only seems that we are in a downward trend of evolution, after kind of reaching a peak in the evolution track and now descending downhill in terms of the development of the mind. We are proud of ourselves for inventing new technology, and discovering new things, calling every one of them as a technological breakthrough, marvelling at our own magnificence, corely vegetating around materialism without realisation but fail to realise and understand that the mind has been a bigger discoverer before and is being underexploited in the present times.

I would call it as ‘Deterioration’ because it makes sense for me only to consider the mind’s adaptation over time which has not improved but only come down as compared to the vedic times. Realising that this is a down road towards the basic feels good because for me it fits the basic notion that every rise shall be followed by an equal fall.

The deterioration is inevitable but we must not forget and try to understand that every destruction leaves behind a certain amount of residue at the end of it which will be the progenitor for the next cycle. So let us think well, focus on our aspirations, and make the residue rich so that entities coming forth shall understand the ultimate underlying truth better.

The ‘Emotion’, the feeling is what drives everyone, every entity alive in the grasp of nature. Everyone fails to realise the origin and the source of all this. Every animal, every entity depicts the same emotions in the exactly the same way !

Well to me it makes absolute sense because it means that there is one supreme entity, who resides inside everyone of us, all animals and all entities part of nature so that the exhibition of emotion is always on the same lines. Ignorance of this fact can dissipate the energy contained and the ambience and the mental makeup which is always trying to force the entity to spend more energy shall succeed in deteriorating the whole itself.

Every entity, if it possesses a form is always geared up in its path to reach the ‘Death’. This is the ultimate black hole from which there is absolutely no escape. The body shall corrode and will be exterminated but the residue shall always remain. What every entity should aim at is to realise the truth of the oneness of all the entities and that supreme who knows what was, what is and what will be is identical in every entity.

I keep getting images to depict and make it clear to myself, to teach myself about this truth. I see all emotions, the heat generated from it, as emerging from the ever undying flame of Rudra’s third eye. He who knows it all, he who never sleeps, he who resides as part of this wretched ignorant soul supplies the fuel for emotions. The flame as we know, has strands, each of which burn with varying intensities, each of which waver in their size which clearly depicts the variation in emotions inside every entity. It is said that calming down the mind, the entity shall be in a state of bliss. Ever wondered about this ? I have. It is because of the conservation of tapas, the energy, the fuel that he provides, stopping it from dissipation for the unconstant self. The tapas, the heat, the fire, the aspiration; Let them all bake thy thoughts and purify this ignorant soul far beyond the imaginable !

The human mind perceives everything in numbers, everything measurable so that it can evaluate and analyze deep about it. In effect, the mental facade which the mind draws over itself blinds it from seeing the obvious truth and correcting the mind that ‘one’ is universal and nothing else.

Starting from a ‘day’, everything has its perfect opposite and the whole action(reaction) can be explained using the set of opposites. The realisation doesn’t occur that day is day because there is presence of sunlight and that night is a fictional word to call the state of absence of sunlight ! Well can’t all opposites be simplified in those terms to yield simpler derivatives ? Of course, Yes.

Perceiving and understanding this is tough for the mind, confusing, it creates unnecessary chaos because it does not realise that it had just created an absence of silence to think clear, not realising that silence can be more blissful for the mind to arrive at a conclusion, not realising that the silence can break the mind if left uncontrolled, not realising that silence can speak much louder than words.

Every entity perceivable is dependent on some other entity at the end ! Well if everything is dependent on everything else then who or what is constant ? There is not an answer for which the mind can pursue years to find but it will take forever. The logical derivation is that there is someone constant, the source of all entities, the ‘Prajapati’ and the final destination to all entities to which everything circles down to.

The supreme existence is very well evident for the mind to perceive but eludes without reason until it is forced to be in unison with the inner remniscence of the source, the destination, the truth, the everything and the one everlasting thing which has always, and will ever be present.

As usual when i was pondering about something abstract, one fine point about the nature of mortals struck me. Now what is the body and what is the mind ? A simple yet very complex question to answer, it had been eating away my brains for a long time. What i arrived at was that the body encapsulates or in other words it is the container for the crux that it contains i.e., the mind. Well that explains why the mind cannot exist on its own without the body and why the body nature is dependent on the mind.

Something else very obvious became a fact right then ! Wondering about why i was not able to push my body as much i could with my mind, the truth, the obvious one that had eluded the grasps of this mortal mind became clear. Containers are never flexible ! Well isn’t it true that the container is always the same but it is how much the container carries which makes the difference in every persona ?

Containers aren’t flexible like the mind and only if the body were the independent entity could someone achieve whatever is aspired physically ! Unfortunately both the body and the mind’s strength don’t coexist ! or so it seems … I respect thee who has complete control over both these worlds, on the body and the spirit, on the self and the container. It is all about persona, the unification of all facades, the realisation of the truth by the body on what it is expected to do, the complete harmony and co-existence of the soul and its bag.

Am i referring to the yogi again ? I frankly don’t know what to infer. Why are such abstract concepts so abstract ? Why are such incomprehensible questions not obvious to the versatile mind ? What is missing here ? I am in search for this truth, trying relentlessly with hope and aspiration undying, given fuel by my purifier.

Oh thee supreme purifier, Take me, and burn these facades, Weld them together and gift me with a boon, What penance do i need to take to call upon thee ? Answer me master or this shall never ever be answered.

Personality, the very common word gets me scared because of its varied interpretation according to different perceptions. What is it ? I ask myself sometimes and each time arrive at a different conclusion totally disconnected to the previous paths. Well it seems more like an illusion of the true self to the ambience acting like a facade, covering the good, bad and the worst faces of oneself. It appeals to be the interaction medium to the outside world with the inner self controlling, liberating, exciting and giving many bodily perceivable emotions to the carrier of the self.

‘Know Thyself’ ; I’ve realised how tough that can be ! Trying to understand about oneself, unknowingly we get caught in one of the facades of the true persona which might depict filtered version of the core mental makeup. Well this is most often never realised and we mortals keep beleiving that probing on the facade has led them to the ultimate bliss. Then what is thy true self, you may ask ! I am searching for that answer too and i guess that the only way to do it is to combine your different layers of facades into one single facade which is absolutely transparent to reflect one’s true self. hmm. Well seems possible very theoretically but thinking about it havent the great Yogis achieved this and maintained their impact on the ambience consistent ? There is one beautiful axiom in physics that states that “All that is theoretical may not be practical, but if something is theoretical then it is definitely possible”. How true!

I sense that every entity’s core is made up of heat and the ways of liberating them are either anger or lust. It can be observed that the Yogis expel their heat in either one of these ways but are very stable with respect to all the other emotions. Cab everyone focus on attaining this ? Can the mind be trained to express every emotion as a combination of these two basic emotions ? Well that is what Yoga is all about isn’t ? Focussing and concentrating thy energy into the form desired by the heart.

Call me mad for saying all this and i dont care because you are cursing just another facade in my billion trillion facades. ( I am not a Yogi, Yet! )

There is a madness in your heart, always trying to break free, influencing the weak mind’s thought process ever so steadily and gaining in to obstruct common sense, morality or any other social instincts imbibed into you. It shall corrupt, pollute and shall degrade your very existence if not controlled within the limits. Left freely it grows like a virus in a helpless host, gradually taking over the sanity left in the soul.

It dwells on the weakness of the human nature, the nature to satisfy hunger and to gain pleasure, the basic impulse that drives you crazy, on seeing the outward manifest of a variant, not very different from thyself. Lives have been spoilt, minds have been corrupted, outlook changed for the mere feel of flesh for a fraction of your existence. The wraith inside everyone sleeps but wakes up by even the slightest rush of adrenaline for want of flesh, grows into an undying monster, you feeding it with hopes now and then and it reciprocates by giving you misery, sheer misery. The frustration shall mount, torment you and will become the sole bane of your existence soon.

Does this all revolve around the single momentary joy of pleasure due to the release of ugliness from the soul bag ? It takes just a moment of sane thought to comprehend that the guilt of it shall linger in thy heart for aeons ! Such a thought in a weak mind could have made it stronger, not making it fall for a parasitic feeling, an ingrained human emotion aimed to destroy the peace of mind. A billionth of a second for the inner eye would have made it blatant that this is not necessary and will not compatible with the existing brahman in us.

Kill thy Lust and Live Free,
Dwell on thy Inner eye and Let Intuition take over.
Dont forget that you are just another leaf in the undying tree.